For each man, one of the most persistent questions in his life is ?Am I a man?? Or, more likely, am I man enough? For each boy, the biggest question is ?When will I be a man?? Or ?What do I have to do to be a man?? Masculinity is the synergistic result of three factors?the abilities, ideas, and actions a male can innately have (his tools); the intentions with which he uses his tools; and the level of acceptance by his society of his chosen masculinity tools and intentions. Required masculinity is the most enforced and expected form of masculinity in our culture. It is also rigid and, in many ways, harmful to men, to people in general, and to communities. Large numbers of men daily face difficulties caused or enhanced by the impacts of this masculinity. As a result, each male in this country must grapple with many challenges to find and express his own masculinity. He needs to realize required masculinity?s impacts and how to get away from required masculinity. While he is achieving this, he also needs to find his real self and his masculinity tools and intentions. Then, there are the problems of figuring out how to manage his emotions and loneliness and how to deal with these, how to cope with conflict, and how to be a father. Using a large range of resources and his personal work with himself and other men, the author guides the reader through these issues and choices. Throughout, the reader is encouraged and helped to create personalized masculinity choices that will bring him the most fulfilling life as a male.