ADDICTION, THE LIFESTYLE, THE RECOVERY
I'm not a celebrity or a model. I'm not rich or famous. I'm a junkie and I will do anything for my next fix.
The author was a very stubborn, naive, and gullible woman with a bad case of low self-esteem. At 18 years old, from an upper middle class suburban family, she was always known as the fat sister. She was the black sheep and the trouble maker.
Believing herself to be stupid, fat, ugly, and incapable of being loved the author leaves the safety, security, and love of her family. She goes out on a journey of her own to try to find love, and acceptance elsewhere.
HER DEEPEST DESIRE IS TO FIT IN SOMEWHERE.
The author encounters a variety of potential suitor's that she can not resist. She finds that once their true intentions are exposed that these exquisitely wrapped packages reveal the contents of deceitful, controlling, and abusive men.
THE AUTHOR GETS LOST IN A CYCLE OF ADDICTION AND ABUSE.
IS IT TOO LATE?
She has already opened, and walked through the door of her self-produced nightmare.
HER SENSES ARE DULLED, AND SHE IS EMOTIONLESS.
HAS SHE LOST HER SOUL, OR DID SHE SELL IT?
Her stubbornness is holding her hostage to the fact that she will always learn things the hard way. There are times when death seems like the only answer. After decades of losing time and time again the author finally submits to the fact that she is out of control, and her life is unmanageable.
THAT IS HER REALITY
Is there any hope for change after almost 30 years of addiction, and crime?
What could possibly happen to the author that would make her change her life in every single way? What is it that turned the author into the woman she was always meant to be?
THIS IS MY STORY
I broke out into a cold sweat, and tried to cry. The tears would not fall because I knew in my heart that I had no one to blame for my situation but myself. I came from a good, loving family. I was never beaten or abused. We went on family vacations every summer. My childhood years could not have been more perfect. What was wrong with me?I looked closely into the mirror, and saw the dark circles beneath my eyes. I was underweight, and my long blonde hair was thinning. I looked away from the mirror quickly, and sat on the cold, tile floor of this cheap motel bathroom.My hand shook a bit as I held the spoon full of heroin. I cooked it up with a blue lighter. I dropped in a small piece of cotton, and drew up the liquid with a syringe. I injected the heroin, and fell slowly back against the wall. The tile was no longer cold, and life did not seem so hopeless anymore.
SWEET MELISSA is a six book memoir series. It is the author's story about her life-long struggle with addiction to heroin, her downward spiral towards self destruction, and finally her recovery. Follow the author down the dark path of substance abuse and the lifestyle that goes with it. In Book One, the author gets involved with prostitution and drugs. She encounters a variety of people, and finds herself addicted to heroin. With that addiction, she falls deeper and deeper into a hole of which she believes will never end. Her self-esteem diminishes, and her life seems worthless.This is a life-long struggle with substance abuse leading to the one event that will finally end it all. This is not a few month habit, but rather a way of life with no other choice at the time. Heroin and substance abuse cloud the mind from thinking properly. It deadens the senses and the soul. It puts you in places you could never imagine in your wildest dreams. Follow the Sweet Melissa series to find out what life changing event will finally open the author's eyes, and shine some hope on her for a brighter future. This is a memoir straight from the heart of the finally recovered.