WARLORDS OF LLANTATIS's graphics, gameplay, and immersive three-dimensional virtual reality experience took the online role playing gaming world by storm when it was first released - but it was first released over fifteen years ago. Now it's a haunt for the nostalgic and unfashionable. Cyrus Baggett and Raj Rengarajulu have been pretending to be Smelrond of Quimnimbriel and Mordaxxe, Pwner of Noobs since college. Now they're old, married, and wanted by most of the crowned heads, secret police organisations and demonic familiars of the game universe. They are considering growing out of this thing - at least, until they meet the Character With No Name. The Character's player is living in one room, which he has never left and appears to be being held in against his will. He doesn't know where in the world the room is; he doesn't even know his own name. The only way of finding out more about him is through playing Warlords of Llantatis, and that can only happen if Mordaxxe and Smelrond can keep him alive for long enough to talk - and if they can stay alive themselves, with Beëlzebelle and the Munchkins, Wizard Sparklebeard and Titanowang Lord of Fertility at large in the same universe.