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Formats
Paperback Book Details
  • 02/2012
  • 9780615566634
  • 152 pages
  • $9.00
Ebook Details
  • 11/2013
  • 0615566634 B007IW9TSM
  • 153 pages
  • $0.77
Stephen C. Bird
Author, Illustrator
Catastrophically Consequential
Chapter 1: The Blonde Boy, the Brunette Boy, the Other Boy and the Father of the Brunette Boy find themselves in a dangerous situation wherein none of them can be trusted with each other's lives. Chapter 2: Lord Szczmawg oversees the "Toxification" of the Gulf of Mecks-Sicko. A post-apocalyptic Gothra Schvulkopf surveys the damage she has done--via the destruction of her competitors. Pluto von Polyphemus and Poseidon Advenszczur fer sher fight over Garic, a Cumbrian slave, in the Orphic Underworld. Chapter 3: The Gooderz, the Badderz and the Evilangelists speak three different kinds of Dumbspeak, for which they despise each other. Chapter 4: In Tallulah Hassle, Florider, Core-Ann Burnin Laidie reminisces over a Doucheyland vacation, Turrie Dzjhonezies and Brownerz. Chapter 5: Dar-Not-Lean struggles with her compulsion with Unconditional Blundt Cake Love, provided by her parents, Float and Ethereal. Ethereal becomes a decisive force in the destiny of Dar-Not-Lean's nemesis, Mannequin Streetwalker. Chapter 6: Across town from Dar-Not-Lean, Incestuous Ingrydd enjoys the benefits of her severely dysfunctional male relatives. Chapter 7: Djzheemi Sparks writes angry, erotic gay poetry; dreams of his New York City and Berlin Future Worlds, and falls under the influence of his Sacred Yet Bestial Tormentors. Chapter 8: Bobby Bluetooth, one of the world's pre-eminent hack comics, reigns over the audience of Djzheemi's Comedy Sh*thole, Gay Ridge, Queers, New York. Female hecklers from both extremes of the political spectrum try to tear him down with their hostile outbursts, but Bobby shuts them up by means of his mediocre wit. Performance artist Szczell Szczocked Szczerry Szczareeya takes the stage in a black burka and attempts to defuse the tension between the West and the Middle East. Core Ann Burnin Laidie protests Szczerry Szczareeya's act. Szczareeya is dragged from the stage by security, and the emcee enacts damage control via the evening's final act, low-class bisexual hustler Tommy Fantasie. Chapter 9: Cindy Cipro defies her mother, antidepressants, the Park Avenue Pearls and Blue Blazer Type Bitches, her dreams, her OCD-anger, her abusive lovers and her generalized fear of men and of sex in the comfort of her East Village condominium. At a New Year’s Eve party, Cindy makes a fateful decision from which there is no return. Chapter 10: Princess Orca Media lives in a medieval castle and is tormented by nighttime voices from the future. Fortunately she will be set for life thanks to the advantages of her arranged marriage with Engelbert Alles Nicht Egal. Chapter 11: Girl from Future uses Backward Time Teleportation to advise and confound Princess Orca Media. Chapter 12: Genevieve Piss Pig encounters Princess Orca Media and regales her with tales of tragic Djzheemi Sparks; Genevieve then proceeds to enjoy the decadence of Klub Nicht-So-Geil’s Chamber of Urinals and its Ledermänner. Chapter 12: Allison Eckslacks Wellness endures the agony and the ecstasy of existence in the guise of different sexes, circumstances and lives. Chapter 13: A group of small town friends bemoan the fate of Ginger Bocey.
Reviews
Foreword Reviews

Catastrophically Consequential

Reviewed by Peter Dabbene
April 24, 2012

A reader’s relationship with books of a distinctive, unconventional, and, dare it be said, eccentric style is often a love-it-or-hate-it affair. Catastrophically Consequential is Stephen C. Bird’s offering to the genre of books that are difficult to categorize, and it’s safe to say that some readers will love it and others will hate it, but few will come away unaffected.

The book is composed of fourteen chapters, the titles of which give some indication of the author’s approach, if not exactly what awaits plot-wise. “Incestuous Ingrydd,” “Bobby Bluetooth,” and “Genevieve Piss Pig” are all characters who inhabit the world of Catastrophically Consequential, and while individual chapters focus on one or another, characters cross-pollinate from one story to the next, achieving a cohesive whole.

Bird also wrote Hideous Exuberance, a satire, and has read from that book at several venues in New York City. In addition, he has been a writer/performer/producer for several one-man shows. Based on Bird’s experience with the spoken word, it follows naturally that Catastrophically Consequential should be suffused with that art form’s varied patois. In every chapter, Bird shows himself to be playful and inventive with language: within the first few pages there is mention of the Gulf of Mecks-Sicko and a character named Ray-Kill Wraith. The bad guys are either Evilangelists or members of the Tallulah-Ban. Some chapters read as over-the-top satire, others appear closer to reality than they might at first seem. But there is a steady sense of honest outrage and concern for people, not just misanthropic venting. After indulging in one depravity after another, Bird’s character Cindy Cipro observes, “I live in a world full of people who wish for what is bad for them; why should I be any different?”

Concealed behind layers of satire, these moments of raw poignancy and social commentary, when discovered, stand out all the more. Bird is also capable of stark and unexpected imagery, as when he ends a chapter with this sentence: “That night Allison dreamt of a flaming Christmas tree falling off a cliff in the dark and into an abyss.”

Bird’s humor is trenchant as well, and plentiful throughout the book. But again, it seems the sort of humor that will have some readers laughing at every page and others finishing the book without so much as a giggle.

The major caveat—not necessarily a flaw, per se—about Catastrophically Consequential is that there is an abundance of sex and foul language, and a number of scenes that some readers might find disturbing. This is not subtle satire; it is in-your-face confrontation, forcing the reader to either embrace it or push it away.

Stephen C. Bird is a provocateur, and Catastrophically Consequential could be described as bold, humorous, raunchy provocation. For readers who enjoy such things, this book is a must-have.

Kirkus Reviews

CATASTROPHICALLY CONSEQUENTIAL

by Stephen C. Bird

KIRKUS REVIEW

Lurid satirical riffs hold up a fun-house mirror to the world in this fantasia.

New York underground littérateur Bird (Hideous Exuberance, 2009) creates an alternative universe peopled by cartoonish characters who intermingle across dreamlike episodes that shatter the conventions of time, space and spelling. On high is the deity Lord Szczmawg, who benevolently smothers our Blue Green Planet with intestinal greenhouse gasses; on Earth is the antagonism between cretinous Evilangelists and burqa-ed Muslim comedians. Barely repressed perversion stalks the rural hinterland of Amurycka Profunda. There roam the likes of high school prostitute Mannequin Streetwalker and her half-sister, Incestuous Ingrydd, while blaringly unrepressed perversion saturates a nightmare Manhattan where self-loathing trust-funders wallow in sadomasochistic scenes that spill over into ritual slaughter. There’s a parade of vaudeville set pieces: Princess Orca Media, a “spoiled, demanding, pre-Freudian and power-drunk bitch” lords over sullen serfs; her time-travelling future incarnation, a ditzy Jersey Goth-ette discourses on Star Trek; a sketch set on the Planet Vomitoria serves “sewage sludge mousse garnished with chicken claws.” Bird’s prose is a stew of surrealism—“She was blissfully unaware as she performed scathing, balletic, synchronized swimming-style moves…while giant carnivorous frogs salivated by the aqua colored kidney shaped swimming pool”—mixed with insult comedy and scabrous sexual provocations. He festoons it with Central European linguistic flourishes: German exclamations, Polish phonics, a weirdly Teutonic hillbilly patois—“Jes cuz we worships Jah-Hee-Zeus dunt mean usns alwaysiez gots tuh be all saintlie like Himmerz!”—that evokes a redneck Weimar cabaret. Threading through the chaos are a wicked caricature of New York scenesters, rage against environmental destruction, religious bigotry and striking photographs of dark roads, lit but not illuminated by garish streetlights that form a sinister, hallucinatory visual counterpoint to the text. Bird’s caustic levity, exuberant wordplay and arresting imagery make for a bracing read—though it’s not for the faint of heart.

This raucous avant-garde comedy will sweep you along with its vigor and originality.

Travalanche

Steve Bird’s “Catastrophically Consequential”

Steve Bird is back!

Well, he hasn’t actually been away. That’s just what you say when someone has a new thing coming out.

I’m sorry. I don’t mean to imply that Steve Bird has a “thing”, or that it’s “coming out”.

I mean to say that, much like “Bond”, “Bird is Back — and Better than Ever!” That is to say, he’s written a new book to follow up on his earlierHideous Exuberance (reviewed here). I had the opportunity to graze upon its leaves over the weekend. Like the grass over a cesspool, it is vivid, vibrant and virulent, and deceptively so for having been nourished on sewage.

You may think that presages a bad review, but that will mean you don’t know me (or Bird) very well. The first law of criticism is Understand what the Artist is Trying to Do…or at the very least, make that attempt. Bird has no desire to be Joe Fiction Guy. This is a Harlequin Romance starring the actual Harlequin — a demented and cruel prankster who goes around with a slapstick disguised as a sausage and hits people with it for the perverse sake of doing so.

When I say I just “grazed”, I mean no aspersion there either. As I mentioned in my last review, elements like plot and character in Bird’s writing  are subsumed before the God of Immediacy. His riffs and wordplay swallow up all other aspects like choking ivy. It’s too dense to plow through. Just as you can’t (or shouldn’t) fill an iced tea glass to the rim with vodka and chug it down, it’s best to take Bird’s writing in little sips. Some portions read as though they were written by Gertrude Stein; others as though by Jar-Jar Binks. Many a felicitous phrase leaps out to be savored. A character named “Nancy Nanny Tranny Granny”: sounds like Gertrude Stein to me. And calling a character Cindy Cipro? That sounds a lot like John Waters. As for Jar-Jar:

Usns been speakin duh Dumbspeak uh reel long time now, evuh since dey wuz Gooderz an Badderz. Jes so youse know, deah two kinds uh Dumbspeak. Deah dat dats duh Gooderz speak, and deah dat dat duh Badderz speak. Duh Badderz speak uh version dats all murkie twistie kreepie…”

Indeed! Which version will YOU embrace? To make an informed decision, you must acquire the manual. Here’s how to order.

News
08/13/2012
Book Roundup of LI Authors 2012

Catastrophically Consequential?
Author: Stephen C. Bird?

By Carson Olivares

Forget about a linear plotline, fanatical Catastrophically Consequential is Stephen C. Bird’s prequel-sequel to his 2009 read Hideous Exuberance. Described as “a story both lovely and shady,” Bird, a Long Island resident, packs a lot into this short book. Intertwining characters ranging from sociopath celebrities to suicidal trust fund girls and suburban swingers are searching in vain for metaphysical clarity. This satirical read buries you in Bird’s comical rants, disturbing inner monologues, stream of conscious dream sequences and surreal scenarios. 

08/25/2012
Gallatin alum shapes surreal world in new avant-garde novel

Gallatin alum shapes surreal world in new avant-garde novel

August 25, 2012

Imagine a novel set in an alternate reality, written in a stream of consciousness style that tells dark and humorous tales of characters who struggle with their sexuality or A-list societal problems.

“Catastrophically Consequential,” written by novelist and performance artist Stephen C. Bird, combines these aspects into a dark, avant-garde literary work.

A 1992 graduate of the Gallatin School of Individualized Study with a concentration in World Literature, Bird began his literary career in 2009 when he wrote and self-published “Hideous Exuberance,” the prequel to “Catastrophically Consequential.” He classifies his latest book as “adult, experimental, fantasy, fiction, satire and novella.” It is a work composed of characters that travel through time and are likely to show up in your own dreams.

“There may or may not be any character or plot development because characters develop to a certain point, but they might drop out for no reason and then reappear later,” Bird said. “There’s no regular continuity in terms of time. Within one chapter the character could be in the present day, and then suddenly fly to 900 years later.”

Populating Bird’s pages are gay teenage boys, suicidal trust fund girls and Jersey princesses of punk rock, to name a few. He describes his characters as “reserved, imbalanced and mental illness-involved people,” with female characters commanding a stronger presence. Suicidal rich girl Cindy Cipro, whose tale began in his first novel, faces masochism and tragedy. Other characters, like gay teenager Djzheemi Sparks, battle depression while trying to salvage friendships. Because the characters’ stories are set in an alternate reality, their situations are far from normal.

“The stories are inner monologues that are going on inside the characters’ heads that I write out,” Bird said. “The main thing about my writing is that it’s non-linear, it’s written in stream of consciousness and it’s surreal. I’m also a visual writer.”

Bird, who has a background in performance art, wrote his novel with a visual mindset. Having produced off off-Broadway in downtown Manhattan since the late ’90s, Bird was inspired by his one-man comedy shows and converted his monologues into character narratives. His writing process is unique: he collects notes from his sets, packs them in FedEx envelopes and reorders them to tell a story.

“I cut and paste a lot,” Bird said. “There is definitely a collage aspect to my writing.”

Jennifer Miller, an author and performance artist known as Rev Jen, met Bird over 15 years ago when he performed at Jen’s open-mic comedy shows.

“[Bird’s novels] are written in stream of consciousness style that very few writers would be brave enough to write in today,” Jen said. “By self-publishing, he has circumvented the need to conform to what publishing industries want and has given himself a lot of artistic freedom. Even though [the characters] are dark and twisted, you get the idea the author had a great deal of fun which is also something that seems to be missing from literature today.”

A version of this story appeared in the Aug. 26 print edition. Kristina Bogos is special features editor. Email her at kbogos@nyunews.com.

In a previous version of this article, WSN incorrectly reported that Jennifer Miller was a reverend. In fact, she is known as Rev Jen. WSN also reported that Bird had produced films off-Broadway. In fact, he produced them off off-Broadway. WSN also reported that Bird was inspired by open-mic comedy shows. In fact, the shows were not open-mic. WSN regrets the errors.

Formats
Paperback Book Details
  • 02/2012
  • 9780615566634
  • 152 pages
  • $9.00
Ebook Details
  • 11/2013
  • 0615566634 B007IW9TSM
  • 153 pages
  • $0.77
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