"An eye-opening read. The unadulterated truth about the publishing industry."
Some of our biggest fans gush about our books on social media all the time. They deserve a shout-out here as well. Click on the link to see her best-of compilation, and maybe read some of her poetry. I hear good things.
“First of all, it’s hilarious.”
“I say bravo Mr. Barker - you have bravely said what
few are willing to. I thoroughly enjoyed this.”
S.A. - goodreads
“Want to be an author? Read this book.”
“This book will repay the cost and time spent reading
it ten times over. If it stops a new author falling for
one of the scams it’s a hundred times.”
S.F. - Book Review
“Masterfully written and exhaustively researched with
enough humor to ensure readers won't slash their
wrists by Chapter 8, this peek inside the vagaries of
the publishing industry is the benchmark by which
all books on this subject should be measured.”
S.K-S. - goodreads
The $1.99 Author is an informative and fun book for those who write books and people who think they might want to.
The Expanded Edition Hardback shows E. A.'s love of "real books" as this version features additional "polishing" with even more humour; an index and a glossary; even a cartoon in addition to various bits of front and rear matter which e-books don't manage well.
Contents
The Blurbs - Whaaat?! They wouldn’t fit on the cover. I
Reader Advisory - Because it’s a thing now. II
Copyright - (How To Lessen Your Chance Of Being Sued. . . III
Dedication - (Insert Memorable Banality Here.) V
For Student Readers - The Clifford-Cole Cheat VII
Forward - You have to start somewhere. IX
Contents - Why is this here? It seems a bit much. XI
Section One - Meat for Cannibals 1
Preface - Caveat Emptor 3
Introduction - Artists Are Makers Surrounded By Takers. 5
Chapter One - Who Are You? 9
Chapter Two - Why Did You Write Your Book? 11
Chapter Three - Popping Your Cherry 23
Chapter Four - THE END Is Just The Beginning. 27
Chapter Five - The Pay-To-Play Game 33
Chapter Six - “There is a sucker born every minute.” 39
Chapter Seven - The Publishing Ladder 41
Section Two - The Greatest Stories. . . LIES Ever Told: 55
Chapter Eight - The Experts Spin 57
Chapter Nine - They Claim We Need A Platform Without Stating What It Is. 61
Chapter Ten - They Tell Us We Must Blahhhg. 69
Chapter Eleven - They Insist We Need To Be On Anti-Social Media. 77
Chapter Twelve - They Assert Success Is Measured In Online Reviews. . . 103
Chapter Twelve & A Half - They Assure Us They Know What Readers Want. 107
Section Three - Writers Are Weird. 113
Chapter Fourteen - Because Chapter Thirteen Would Be Bad Luck. 115
Chapter Fifteen - A Special Exclusive Offer From Me To You. 119
Chapter Sixteen - “If I were a rich man. . .” 125
Chapter Seventeen - A Slanted History of Publishing 131 Section Four - “The truth shall set you free, but first it will piss you off.” 139
Chapter Eighteen - Writers write, right? 141
Chapter Nineteen - “And the winner IS. . . NOT YOU!” 149
Chapter Twenty - Traditional Publishing: The Money. . . 159
Chapter Twenty-One - Successful Marketers Are Not Looking For. . . 167
Chapter Twenty-Two - Nuts and Bolts 193
Chapter Twenty-Three - The $1.99 Author 219 Index - (Adds weight to nonfiction books. Only perused by smart people.) 237
Glossary - A Guide To Publishing Terminology 267
About The Author - “Truths Are Not Easy To Sell, But You Sleep Better. . .” 275